|Written by Patrick Morley|
|Monday, December 02 2013 00:00|
(Excerpt from How God Makes Men, Multnomah, 2013)
My Personal Testimony
For the first dozen years of my spiritual journey, I believed in Jesus but pretty much did what I wanted to do. At first I didn't know that Jesus wanted to be involved in all the details of my life--freshman mistake. But then, when I finally began to understand that He did, I still wanted to call the shots--sophomore mistake. Like Moses, I had a vision of being a deliverer. I pictured myself becoming the first person in my family ever to get a college degree. I pictured myself becoming a wildly successful businessman and provider. I saw myself as a cycle breaker delivering my family from repeating the mistakes of my failed youth. I was sure that God had "sent" me to do all these things. But as a practical matter, while my intentions were noble, my worldview was really one of selfish ambition, not humble surrender.
One day it dawned on me that some of the other Christian guys around me were getting very different--and enviable--results from their faith. So I called a time-out and decided to study the Bible to see if I could figure out what was going on. I thought that after a couple of weeks I would get it all sorted out, make the fix, and then really go and do something great for God.
At the time, I was so overconfident and prideful that I thought once I was "fixed," the new, revised version of me could grow my business bigger and better than ever. But as I said, God is more interested in shaping our character than in improving our circumstances. And that takes time.