How To Handle Online Criticism: Getting Ripped
I recently got ripped for a blog post. I didn’t mind (this time), but when someone goes off on us it raises many questions:
Why does he or she feel the need to say this? What is he feeling? What is she thinking? What is the problem they are trying to solve?
Is their critique fair? Or is it negative? Or fair but too much of a pile on? And is it fair to criticize a single blog or Facebook post in isolation without considering everything else you have said in context? And then there are the differences in personality and temperament. For example, is it fair for someone who wants a mathematical answer to criticize a poet’s approach because he is not also a mathematician?
Frankly, I could probably crush this and other criticisms with a sharp retort. I could adroitly impale my critics with their own pens. I could coherently point out how this person has criticized me not for what I “did” write, but because I didn’t write the article they “wish” I would’ve written. I could handily explain that it’s not fair to evaluate a post without considering the intentions of the poster.
However, I can also meditate on how Jesus was criticized, falsely accused, persecuted, even laughed at, and yet he did not respond in kind. And I can wonder how he would respond.
Has a judgment of charity been extended to me? No. Is this person treating me the way that he would want to be treated? No.
But the more important question is, will I respond by treating him the way that I want to be treated?
So by faith I choose to love this person not in spite of who they are, but because of whose I am.
And I’m praying I will still feel the same way in 10 minutes.
Since this blog post is from February, I’m not sure what social media etiquette demands. Can I not respond due to the passing of time? Not sure and honestly, I’m finding the rules of social media etiquette seem to be driven by the current flavor of the season. Therefore I’ll choose to respond.
I’m just getting started with growing a social media presence and this thought has been on my mind. What if someone doesn’t like what I say? I appreciate a difference of opinion, but the existence of this wonderful channel of sharing information has also become a way for the hurt, the cowardly and the downright evil to say they want to say. Yet, that is the conundrum of the freedom of speech.
I thank you for your perspective. It’s a reminder to use Jesus as my example. I’m always amazed by his response on the way to the cross and while there. Asking God to forgive the very people who spit on you…wow. So thanks for the reminder and for the other reminder, which is 10 minutes, one hour, one day, one week, and one month later we may still be giving grace to the critic. Oh boy!
Mine is not one of online criticism, but among coworkers. Your example of the dichotomy of thought between poets and mathematicians is brilliant. It has shed a new light and appreciation for our differences and how we communicate. I struggle daily to address criticism with grace and dignity. In a word, the way I would want to be treated. I don’t understand them, and clearly they don’t get it. Not even in Corporate America, fair treatment of others, or just plain old being nice. It is a me-centric climate where the blame is projected on others instead of accepting responsibility.
I truly seek to take the high road and emulate Christ as in the midst of His criticisms. Thank you for this blog, which I found in timely mysticism, to address my current situation.
Mike in KY