Between 2000 and 2023, the liberal-conservative fissure dividing young men and women in America doubled in size. In that time, the male trend was surprisingly stable. Young women did the heavy lifting, becoming five times more liberal in 2023 than their predecessors in 2000.
According to more recent data, the divide is only getting wider as young women refuse to slow their pace toward the left.
This subtitle is a bit tongue-in-cheek.[1] For one thing, the young female population in America isn’t monolithic. On the other end, a “stable” ideological trend doesn’t indicate virtue. Still, the title captures the essence of our situation.
In a compelling evaluation of the data, X-user vittorio adds a summary of the doctrine that has energized the female trend:
“[Feminine] instincts and biology [are] oppression and wrong. Wanting children [is] brainwashing. Wanting a provider husband [is] internalized misogyny. Their natural desires [are] false consciousness installed by patriarchy.”
Assuming the numbers tell the truth, if this isn’t fleeing the garden, I don’t know what is.
To Diagnose Or to Remedy
The tension between diagnosis and remedy will always exist. There will always be those inclined toward diagnosis—”What is going on? No, what is really going on and why?” But many, maybe most, are inclined toward remedy, ranking action and outcome higher on the list of priorities.
So, the analysts quietly look down upon the pragmatists for their ‘negligence,’ while the pragmatists boldly bypass the ‘miscalibrated obsession’ of the analysts.
Of course, I’ve highlighted the extremes to make a point. Most of us exist somewhere in between and the tension we experience varies.
Fortunately, this isn’t a case of endorsing one and jettisoning the other. As you might imagine, wisdom requires a balance of these instincts.
In his article, vittorio offers a “perfect storm” diagnosis of the sharp leftward trajectory of young women. Seeking to avoid oversimplification or what he calls “tribal” answers, he appeals to a “system of interlocking causes that happened to affect one gender faster and harder than the other”—a system with components ranging from biology and technology to algorithm and ideology.
On the remedial side, vittorio has little to say. So this is where I want to dig deeper.
Speaking of both male and female trends, this is how the article comes to a close:
“We’re watching the results in real time. Two failure modes. One graph. Both lines moving away from each other and away from anything healthy. I don’t know how this ends. I don’t think anyone does. I don’t think it will. Both machines are still running.”
Vittorio calls both trends unhealthy. But are both unhealthy in the same way?
At this point, I need to forfeit any semblance of neutrality and lay my cards on the table. If we think that both trends are equally unhealthy, it is natural to assume that the real violence is our disunity…
when in fact it is not.
The Violence of Disunity
The progressive feminine trend isn’t just another fine alternative to the conservative trend. It’s bad for families, it’s bad for communities, and it’s bad for the world. And many young men know this, as the data has shown.
Contrary to popular belief, the real problem isn’t polarization.
We hear this a lot:
“Our nation is so polarized,” and “our division is destroying us.” In other words, the real violence is our disunity.
But if the real violence is our disunity, what is the solution?
Well, we must come together around higher ideals (the vaguer, the better) and lay aside our hatred and petty grievances—as the nation was reminded by the videoboard at this year’s Superbowl half-time show, “The only thing more powerful than hate is love.”
All of this is misguided for several reasons. Here are two:
- It’s a band-aid solution to a mortal-wound problem. The fissure that is rending the country (and apparently distinguishing men from women) will not be mended with vague sentiments of unity, however well-intentioned they may be.
- More importantly, the “wound” isn’t really the problem. The violence isn’t our disunity. The real issue is that there are two incompatible ideologies attempting to coexist within a single society, one of which is bent on repudiating classical beliefs about selfhood and love. This isn’t merely about policy. It’s about living as selves in family, community, and country.
But we mustn’t be fooled. Just because young men are now trending conservative, we shouldn’t pretend that conservativism is their savior. Are they any less lonely? Any less withdrawn? Any less captivated by digital and chemical pacifiers? The data is not ambiguous.
The conservative “gospel” may look better for societies than its progressive counterpart, but I’m not content to leave it at that. When conservatism goes rogue, dark corners of the “manosphere” begin to emerge and “conspire together against the LORD and against his Messiah, saying, ‘Let us burst their bonds apart and cast away their cords from us’” (Psalm 2:2-3). Conservatism in resistance to the scepter of Christ is a keg of black powder in a firestorm.
No, this is not a promotion of the conservative gospel. It’s an attempt to cut through the fog, be realistic about the perils of this young female movement, and highlight the unique responsibility of young Christian men to counter it.
So, what is a young Christian man to do?
Does he have a role to play in the future of feminine ideology? Is he even allowed to ask that?
Here are some targeted questions that bring the rubber to the road:
- As a single man, how does this feminine trend impact his search for a wife? Or the appeal of marriage in general?
- As a husband and father, how does it impact his care for his wife and children?
The Blessing and the Curse
With so many young women marching east of Eden, young men are faced with several challenges. First, single men.
Statistically speaking, the chances of stumbling upon a young woman with conservative values are slim and growing slimmer. From an economic angle, supply and demand are at an imbalance. The data suggests a surplus of young, conservative men and a scarcity of young, conservative women. It’s no wonder the average age of marriage continues to rise, and voluntary celibacy is an option on the table. The single, conservative man faces a frustrating dilemma.
Aside from celibacy, he has the option to 1) stand firm in his desire to marry someone with traditional values, knowing that this may significantly extend his singleness and demand greater effort.
The other option is to 2) question how necessary these values are to a successful marriage and widen his pool of options, potentially shortening his singleness and lessening the effort required to find a spouse.
I am here to defend option one, but not without context for the dilemma.
Why can’t a man expect “the right one” to fall into his lap, as she did for Adam?
Look at the trail of carnage…
The sons of Adam now live in a very different land, one scarred by ages of male passivity and tyranny. In fact, the feminine instinct to dismiss the relics of “paradise lost” is not altogether irrational—and it’s not new.
Who was truly responsible for the flight of Hagar in Genesis 21? Sarah and her malicious jealousy? Hardly. It was Abraham in his faithless exploitation and subsequent passivity. Historically speaking, the daughters of Eve are driven to the wilderness by the failure of Adam’s sons to be who they were designed to be.
What a disastrous situation we find ourselves in today, where the waterless wilderness of progressivism offers more freedom than the starving city of socio-cultural conservatism.
No, it’s not surprising at all that single men face the challenges that they do. The ground wasn’t the only thing affected by the sins of Adam and Eve. The journey toward marriage now involves difficulty, risk, and sacrifice.
We have a mess on our hands, but it only becomes a tragedy when men surrender to discouragement and become prey to passivity.
Passivity is an ancient and formidable spirit. It seized Adam. It seized Abraham. It seized David and Solomon—in every case devastating family and society. But these stories are told to inspire action, not despair. Single men have a unique opportunity to act with the tenacity of Christ, who rejected passivity and tyranny in his quest for a bride—traversing heaven, earth, and hell for a spouse of unimaginable worth—the marvel of angels, the likes of whom Eden has never seen.
But is God commanding single men to leave the comforts of home, sacrificing time and resources in search of a spouse? Is this the only way to conquer passivity and follow in the footsteps of Christ?
Of course not. And no one should create such an obligation.
Marrying someone who values socio-cultural conservativism is not the cure for a ruined world. But in response to the scarcity of young, conservative women and the surplus of young, conservative men—is this an appropriate and commendable quest? Could it be the single stone which threatens the two birds of passivity and singleness?
Domestic Magic
Finally, married men.
Some are driven to engage with destructive ideologies out there in the public sphere. Those who are effective and influential win platforms and, in some cases, receive celebratory, even heroic, status. They learn to leverage their presence on YouTube, podcasts, and social media to win the affections of those who think like them, and if they are winsome and wise, to win the affections of those with whom they disagree. Naturally, we marvel at them and their diligence.
Likewise, it’s easy to hear statistics like “As a group, young women are over five times more progressive than they were in 2000” and immediately think, “It’s amazing what’s happening out there!” And we’re drawn to influential voices engaging “out there” because “out there” is where the magic happens
Sure, a lot happens out there. But we mustn’t let it distract us, for very individual engagement out there is no less valuable than the everyday engagements under the roof, close to home—protecting, guiding, training, loving.
Public engagement is a respectable operation, but the real magic is domestic. God didn’t first invent society to create and supervise the family. He first invented the family to create and supervise society. Do we want to change the direction of society? There is magic in the home. It may not be elegant or dynamic or quick. But it is effective. It was God’s idea, after all.
A husband’s first ministry is to his wife. Regardless of her competence, he is her provider, her guardian, and her guide. His responsibility is to renounce passivity and tyranny and to nourish her with paradisical joy so that the wilderness forever remains lifeless.
If and when he has children, they are his secondary ministry. The future! Not by teaching his sons and daughters about the violence of disunity or the virtues of get-along-ism. No, he must show them the value feminine instincts and biology, the sanctity of motherhood, and the magic of a husband who is for his wife what Christ is to his. In essence, he must inspire within them culture-preserving purpose.
And then he must pray.
He must pray that his sons and grandsons stand up and dismantle the reproach that profanes the edicts of Eden.
He must pray that his daughters become mothers, who have daughters who become mothers, each one securely embracing Edenic femininity.
And after a day or two on the divine calendar, just maybe we will see Eve’s daughters repopulating the garden they were made for.
This is not an attempt to complete new creation in a fallen world, but to aim more accurately toward the goal of cosmic order.
There is no quick fix. Single men. Married men. Fathers. Every circumstance is fraught with age-old challenges. But in every challenge there is an opportunity to crush passivity and make a difference for the future of feminine ideology. This is what we were made for.
[1] The allusion to Eden is purely symbolic, ironic, and rhetorical. Here, the garden represents the natural order that promotes human flourishing. Thus, conservatism and progressivism are (broadly speaking) compared to embracing and wandering from the garden. In no way am I implying that American society is the paradise of God…
