The following is a New Adam Project intro to the article Are we raising young men and women who know how to build anything at all?, originally published by Anthony B. Bradley on Substack.
If you’re not keeping an eye on what Anthony Bradley is writing, you need to repent.
Obviously, we’re kidding. But in all seriousness, the man is a keen observer and has sharp intuition, as the following article demonstrates.
He refers to the following as “a few random thoughts.”
They may be random, but they’re far from irrelevant. Whether you’re a young man building your life or an older man impacting your children or grandchildren, these observations will be of value to you.
*Original article below
Are we raising young men and women who know how to build anything at all?
September 15, 2026 | By Anthony B. Bradley
A few random thoughts . . .
I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m more of a hobbyist cultural anthropologist than anything else. Ha! I really enjoy observing human beings in their natural habitats and trying to make sense of what I see.
Here are a few things I’m observing in real time:1
I. Men Willing Give Up Their Friends For Dating/Marriage While Women Do Not
I’m watching young adult men, from college age onward, sever their male friendships for girlfriends and, eventually, wives, while the women they date and marry do not do the same.
Here are the steps:
Step 1: Young man meets young woman
Step 2: They start dating
Step 3: Two forms: (1) The young woman demands her partner’s undivided attention and unquestioned availability. He is always “on call” whenever she wants his presence. Or, (2) “some guys are never asked for their undivided attention but they assumed that being a good boyfriend means giving that and being a bad boyfriend means saying no or having other priorities.”
Step 4: In a relational shift away from this friends, girlfriend(or wife) becomes his sole source of emotional support and vulnerability.
Step 5: The young man never makes plans with his friends, or cancels on them, so he can always be available for her.
Step 6: The young woman maintains her female friendships and continues her “girls’-only” activities; when she’s out with her friends, he’s alone.
Step 7: His friends stop reaching out because he keeps saying “no,” either because he’s with her or because he needs to stay available whenever she wants him. He stops initiating plans with his male friends.
Step 8: Since male friendships require more time and shared physical activity to sustain, he loses his friends over time.
Step 9: He ends up in a long-term relationship, but friendless.
Am I missing any?
In “An uphill battle: Why are midlife men struggling to make—and keep—friends?” published in the Guardian, Alina Dizik explains the pattern this way:
- Men enter romantic relationships and allow their male friendships to fade.
- They increasingly depend on their girlfriend or wife to organize their social life.
- Their ability to initiate and maintain friendships gradually weakens.
- After a breakup, divorce, or death of a spouse, they may discover that they have no independent social network.
QUESTION: Why do men let this happen?
II. Raising Boring Sons
The piece I wrote on raising boring sons absolutely blew up. It’s now up to about 63,000 views. That’s nuts. I did not see that coming at all. Had I known, I would have included more content about my fatherhood book in the article. Ha!
I wrote it somewhat on a whim. As I’ve traveled around, I’ve noticed just how boring so many guys are, and I kept asking myself, “How does this happen?” Some guys know they are boring. Others are completely boring and do not even realize it.
The article seemed to irritate a few people, but what fascinated me was that I did not receive a single critical response from a woman. Not one woman I saw disagreed.
I still don’t know why it blew up so much. Any thoughts?
III. We need More Christian Women and Men in Industrial Design
My absolute favorite magazine is Metropolis. According to its website, “METROPOLIS brings together the ideas, projects, products, and people that will shape the future of design. For over 40 years we have built deep expertise in sustainable design, cutting-edge technology, and shifts in professional practice. We believe in design that makes a positive impact on people and the planet.”
To me, this is a truly heavenly pursuit.
I can’t remember the last time I met a Christian teenager or young adult who wanted to become a product designer. Correction: I do know one that I spoke to recently. Yet you cannot get much more Genesis 1 and 2 than designing products that human beings use to make their lives better.
Here’s how Qualtrics defines product design:
Product design is the process of imagining, conceptualizing, testing, iterating and refining a product, service or experience so it’s ready for its end user. Designers spend significant time on each of these steps, meaning that product design is a blend of research, strategy, industry knowledge and creative thinking.
So, Christians ought to be leaders in the world of product design, right? We have a rich anthropology, a theology of co-creation, an appreciation for nature, a love of human flourishing, and so on.
I’ve been teaching for nearly 30 years, and I can remember only one student who said that he or she wanted a career designing products for people to use.
In fact, Cedarville University is the only Christian college in America that I could find with a major in physical product design, including consumer products, furniture, transportation, prototyping, and industrial design.
Do Christians not want to make beautiful things that people use every day?
In light of Genesis 1 and 2, why aren’t industrial design and architecture offered as majors at every Christian liberal arts college in America? Design ought to be one of the vocations that churches encourage young people to pursue. It is a form of loving one’s neighbor: designing products that contribute to human flourishing.
Is Cedarville the only Christian college that understands this?
IV. Conclusion
These observations leave me wondering whether we are raising young men and women who know how to build anything at all: lasting friendships, interesting lives, or beautiful things that help their neighbors flourish.
Endnotes
1. I want to be clear: I am actually seeing this pattern right now with young men I know!
